life as best as i remember it…

About the time that Jenna first started Life After Baby, she received Dadditude by Philip Lerman to review for LAB. It’d been sitting under the bed for a bit (sorry Philip) due to reading clubs, library contests, etc. But I needed a book, it was there, I picked it up, and I finished it in three nights.

Honestly, I’m always a bit skeptical (yeah, me?!) of parenting books, namely books that deal with fatherhood and being “real men” and “real dads.” Sure, I may be self-conscious, but it’s only because being a my version of a manly man consists of Ben Sherman track-jackets, post-modern literature, and vintage record stores. So needless today when I read the subtitle, “How a Real Man became a Real Dad” I was skeptical. I figured I would read the book just so I could disagree with the author. Plus the guy did send us the book to review, so… we should review it. I’m so glad I did; I’m so glad I was wrong.

Little did I know that Philip Lerman not only produced America’s Most Wanted and helped start USA Today, but he also is a music geek like me. He had me at his first mention of his 3 year old’s favorite Beatle (Paul) and kept me with the subsequent hundreds of musical references. He knew the way to this dad’s heart.

However, even without the music references this book was great: funny, endearing, honest and vulnerable. Philip shares his journey towards fatherhood with a great sense of humor that any man would find funny as well as a refreshing dose of honesty that few can capture on the page. As he fast forwards through the first three years of Max’s life, he recounts story upon story which on so many levels is every father’s story. I found myself in the pages, laughing with Philip at my own parenting mishaps and celebrating our parenting wins as well.

Some of my favorite moments include:

Page 54: “At four, Max is convinced that Daddy has to come chase the bad dreams away. May he never stop believing that, and may I always believe I can.” I literally teared up when I read that line the first time. Alone, it would have been worth the cost of the book in what it says about parenting and being a fully-present father.

Page 85: “Everything matters. It is, ultimately, the lesson that the child teaches the father. Because, at our age, we start to forget that. Mom’s don’t forget it, but dads do. And so we need to be taught, over and over. Which is what our children do. They teach us this one lesson, over and over. Everything matters.” This was the point to a brilliant anecdote about an orange balloon that I won’t do justice. You’ll just have to read it for yourself.

Page 128: I’m not going to spoil it. But if any child in your household watches Dora the Explorer, run to the nearest Barnes and Noble and read page 128. Drop. Dead. Funny. I actually made Jenna stop reading her book and read this page. She was laughing right out loud with me.

Page 216: “…and I felt like, hey, this parenting stuff is getting easier. You get to tell yourself that once in a while. It’s the illusion that keeps you going.” At the time I read this page, it was exactly how I felt. Parenting is not easy, but Philip captured a moment on the page where the stars aligned to create a perfect moment. We get those every so often; they keep us going in the midst of the chaos.

All in all, Dadditude is just a great, quick read for every dad. You’ll sympathize with Philip, and you’ll learn from him as well. Check it out.